


Learning to Let Go

by rosewaterangel



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mentioned Asgore Dreemurr, Mentioned Asriel Dreemurr, Mentioned Toriel Dreemurr, Nonbinary Chara (Undertale), Nonbinary Frisk (Undertale), Post-Undertale Pacifist Route, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, i just. very badly wanted to be able to save them too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 11:07:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25349707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosewaterangel/pseuds/rosewaterangel
Summary: Somewhere, deep in the back of Frisk’s mind, they hear a whisper. It’s so faint, they barely recognize it. Barely even notice that it’s there, just a ghost of a whisper."Are you happy?”---What if Frisk met Chara after the true pacifist ending, instead of Asriel?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	Learning to Let Go

Somewhere, deep in the back of Frisk’s mind, they hear a whisper. It’s so faint, they barely recognize it. Barely even notice that it’s there, just a ghost of a whisper.

"Are you happy?”

They try to ignore it. Afterall, this is their happy ending. Finally, after all this time. After all of the pain and suffering and countless resets, they’ve finally made it to their happy, peaceful ending.

“You've taken everything from me. You must be very pleased with yourself… Aren't you?"

They try to read one of the signs, but no longer know how. Something in their mind had always told them what they said, but no longer. Not like it’s all that important anymore, though, right?

“They all love you. All of them.” The voice whispered. It sounds like it’s laughing.

“You’re their angel. The golden child.”

They kept walking. There’s something important they have to do, and it’s a long way back Home.

“They’ve forgotten about me by now. I wouldn’t doubt it, would you? How long has it been…?”

Frisk didn’t answer, for they didn’t know. What could they possibly tell this voice to comfort them? Isn’t this just a part of Frisk’s subconscious? Just another piece of their mind that had awoken when they fell? Stranger things have surely happened in their journey.

They stopped to talk to every monster they saw on their way. A sense of relief washed over the kingdom. Finally, peace. Finally, freedom.

Snow crunches beneath their feet, the cool air wrapping around their skin in blistering waves like vines wrapped around a tree. The snowdogs are still in place, their necks still incredibly long. They go up and check one out, but it’s like their mind is blank. Usually there’s something inside to crack a little joke when they see something silly like this, but it’s like it’s vanished.

If this is their happy ending, why do they feel so hollow?

Stepping through the door into the Ruins, they feel loving warmth pour into their heart like a fresh cup of tea. The smell of butterscotch and cinnamon still fills the air, even now, after their long journey.

Smells like home.

The pie is still way too large for them to even consider taking any. What do they look like, some kind of animal that could eat a whole pie by themself?

Leaving the pie alone, Frisk headed back out of the house. It doesn’t take long to reach the end of the Ruins there, and soon enough they’ve returned to the place they began. They don’t know why exactly, but they were expecting to see someone here, waiting for them.

Even still, they’ve come all this way. They might as well make their peace with this place.

Frisk took in the sight of where they had fallen underground. Light barely trickled in from far above. So little of the pale-yellow light hit the ground, shining down on the flowers below.

Sitting in front of the bed of golden flowers, they pause for a moment, reflecting on all they’d been through since they came to this place. All of the monsters they’d met, the friends they’d made, the family they’d found… It was worth all of the pain. It was worth all of the times they’d died and come right back here, to these flowers. They thanked them for breaking their fall. If this flowerbed hadn’t been here, they surely would have died.

“… Are you quite finished?”

Ah, the voice returns.

“Why do you keep staring at that place? Did you want a turn? I promise laying buried in dirt isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.” The voice moved closer, sounding like it came from right behind them.

They turned around to see a little kid. They probably couldn’t be more than a few years older than Frisk. They looked the stranger over, a little bit confused. That’s a human person!

The person stared at Frisk, watching the examination. “Ah… So you can see me? It’s about time!” The child—who Frisk recognized as the guiding narrator of their journey—stood before them, their hands in their pockets. “Greetings. I am Chara. … Perhaps I should have introduced myself earlier? Not like it matters anymore, though.”

They shift how they’re sitting so their body is facing the child, wanting to hear what they had to say. After all, they came back here to talk to everyone they’d met on their journey, right? And if this person—Chara—was the voice in their head, they were going to stick around to say goodbye to them. After all, there’s no way Frisk would’ve made it through if it wasn’t for them.

Chara stayed standing, though perhaps it was only so they could be bigger than Frisk. Works great for intimidation.

“… Why are you still here?” They watched Frisk’s face, searching for a response they were unable to find. “You have the perfect ending. You get to leave. … Why are you even here still? You’ve got my-“ They huffed in frustration, unable to put their thoughts into words. They felt like Frisk had stolen their family from them. ”You won, okay? You did what I couldn’t, and now you have your perfect ending. Why hang around? Do you want to take my grave away from me too?”

Frisk shook their head, eyebrows turned up with worry. Could Chara really not see how much Toriel and Asgore, even after all these years, love them, their child? Does that insecurity run so deep that it will make them believe the gentle and kind Dreemurr’s could ever stop loving their child?

“What do you mean, no? … Are you trying to make me feel bad? You can just leave. Mom will take care of you. Why wouldn’t she? You’re the perfect replacement.” Chara balled their hands into fists, frustration urging them on. They didn’t know how to handle what they were feeling anymore, all they could do was vent their fear and frustration. It swirled around inside them like boiling water in a kettle, and thing they could do was allow the screeching steam escape.

“She’s pretty lost without some poor thing to take care of. I don’t know why, but she seems to like taking in strays.” Their eyes were wide and wild, small hands shaking at their sides.

“… You should go keep them company instead.” Chara sat on the floor, staring through them. It seems like they’ve started to get tired of this. “I’ve hardly earned it.” Their gaze landed on the bed of flowers.

What a pitiful sight.

“Mr. Dad and Mrs. Mom are good parents. I think you’ll like them.” Their voice was quieter this time, now just above a whisper. And for a while after their outburst, everything was quiet. The sun above them had started to set, the moon shining down, gentle and blue over the two. A soft breeze rolled in, pushing through the petals on the flowers, blowing pollen to collect on their clothes.

“… You know, Frisk… I really should thank you. It’s been so long since I had someone I could call a friend.” They pulled their knees up under their chin, hugging their legs, fingers picking at the laces of their boots. “So thanks, I guess. It was a nice intermission from what will become an eternity of loneliness.”

Frisk moved to sit beside them, placing their hand on Chara’s back to try and comfort them. It doesn’t seem like it’s helping a whole lot, but they don’t seem to mind, either.

There was a long moment of silence, the pair of children just sitting there, staring at the bed of golden flowers. Chara secretly hoped Frisk would take this time to leave them, but it didn’t seem like that would be happening. Of course not, right? They’d gotten to know Frisk pretty well up to now, they weren’t the type to just abandon someone.

After the long pause of wishful thinking, Chara began to speak again. “If you’re going to insist on sticking around for a minute, I guess I have to talk.” Chara said. “Heh, not like I have much problem with that. I’m sure you loved hearing my thoughts!” They were smiling, but they didn’t really seem happy.

“If I’m going to be stuck here forever, I want to at least get this much off my chest. Look… I don’t know why you came here, to be honest. I mean, I had some theories, but I think I was just projecting a little. Maybe you were just curious. … I’m not going to bore you with my life story, don’t worry. What I will tell you is this: the reason I climbed Mt. Ebott was to take my life. … Well don’t look so upset about it! I ended up here, didn’t I? Besides, it was the first time I had ever felt relief. I think I was grinning the whole way up the mountain. I thought it would mean freedom. Some sort of end-of-life catharsis or something. … But when I jumped, I only caused trouble for everyone.” They started picking at their stubby nails. It’s not like they could bleed anymore, so who cares?

“I made so many problems for them. I don’t think I was the greatest child, and I doubt I’m even one they wanted.” Chara took a deep breath, closing their eyes as they started to recall a story.

“I remember once, maybe a week or two after I’d landed, when Asriel told mom he didn’t know humans had stripes. She didn’t understand. ‘Chara is wearing a striped shirt because they are a child’, she told him. But that’s not what he meant.” They rubbed their face, the heels of their palms settling over their eyes.

“I don’t think he understood, even when she started getting concerned. He told her about the lines he saw on my skin. It is sort of hard to hide them when they’re everywhere.” They tried to laugh it off, but the memory weighed down on them.

“‘Sometimes pain appears on humans that way’, she’d told him. ‘It’s best not to mention it, it may upset them’. Asriel was crying, I think. He cries a lot. … He didn’t want me to be in pain. What a crybaby, am I right?” They grit their teeth, “They didn’t know I could hear them, I don’t think. The next day, all of the knives were hidden away, and she’d dulled down all the tools. Must’ve made cooking really hard, huh?” They smiled a little. “They probably had to make something sharp out of magic, something I couldn’t get to.” That isn’t funny, but they giggled anyway.

Great way to hide the pain.

“See? Even something like that. I made them both worry about me. About the child they didn’t want. The mistake. The accident. … And I’d inconvenienced them again. It must have been such a burden to have a child like that.” Their hands moved away from their eyes, returning to hug their legs. “So how lucky they are now to have you. A perfect child, just like they wanted.”

“Can you promise me something, Frisk?” They turned towards the small human beside them. “Make sure they never forget me?” They watched Frisk for a moment, seeing their surprise.

Chara forced out a loud, cackling laugh. “On second thought, don’t! It’s okay. It’s probably best if they forget me anyway. Besides, I don’t care if my folks remember me. Not like I could talk to them or anything if they were here anyway.”

They stood up, stretching a little. “Well… Now you know a little about me. Promise not to tell anyone?” Walking over to the bed of flowers, Chara fell on their back, their arms out to the sides. “Go on, Frisk. Enjoy your happy ending. I’ve decided to allow it.” They waited for the other fallen human to leave.

But they didn’t.

“Frisk… I know you have something better to do than just watch me.”

But Frisk didn’t move.

“Damn it Frisk, go away! Don’t you have anything better to do?”

They shuffled up beside Chara, holding their small, cold hand. They followed the steps Chara had taught them, wanting so badly to take the pain of eternal loneliness away from them.

“Trying to save me? That’s sweet. But you can’t save someone who’s beyond repair.”

But they tried again.

“… Frisk, please. Just let me be alone.”

And they tried again.

“I’ve been alone for the past hundred years. What’s an eternity more?”

And again.

Their hand rested on Chara’s forehead, trying to bring back the memories of their life with the Dreemurr family. They played in the back of Chara’s mind like a film. They watched the movie of their life, hearing all of the laughter, all the music and cheerful conversation. There was so much joy in their home.

They saw all of the nights they had spent staying up late with Asriel to read, sitting under the covers in a little blanket fort with a flashlight. He would read to them before they could do it themself. He was always kind, even when Chara would tease him.

“… I know they didn’t hate me. Logically, they couldn’t have, right?”

How they would bake with Toriel, and her endless patience for them even when they would sneak pieces of the butterscotch. She never got upset with them for it. Never once yelled at them when the two had to venture out to the market to buy some more.

“They never screamed at me. I never had to be afraid of them.”

It was the king’s birthday. Every monster in the underground knew; they all loved the gentle giant of a monarch. Presents arrived at the house, monsters from far and wide arriving to deliver a cake or gift of some kind. The house was full of smiles and joy, and Asgore thanked every monster for their generous gifts.

However, nothing matched the light in his eyes when he held the handmade sweater from Chara. He gave them such a tight hug, it nearly crushed them. He didn’t take the sweater off until a full week later when Toriel forced him to let her wash the smelly thing.

“I love them so much. I love them more than anything.”

On their deathbed, their family’s kind, gentle faces surrounded them. They never had to feel alone, right up to the moment they passed away. It took three days before the pain was too much for their small body to take. Three days of their family endlessly holding them, three days of kisses on the forehead, of gentle and kind words. In the end, they were nothing but loved.

“They were my family. All I wanted to do was make them happy.”

Something burned within their chest. A glowing force, pounding at the wall of their rib cage. The glowing light began in the center of their chest, slowly working its way through them, bathing them in a warm glowing light.

Their body shone with a blinding white light, until finally, it started to fade. Chara’s body faded out of existence, and once more, it was quiet. Chara was gone, truly gone, and finally at peace. Frisk could no longer hear their voice, that last bit of their consciousness had passed on. They were finally at peace.

And as they left, they had a smile on their face.

All that remained of the child, the first human to have fallen into the underground all those years ago, was a little gold locket, laying among a bed of golden flowers.


End file.
